The Belgian affair

Wrote this posts while waiting for the connecting flight..uploading it now...

Waiting for the connecting flight to back home from Belgium. The interview went out good (or so I think). Reinforced my feeling that I can be charming if needed. I do not like to answer all the mushy- mushy/stupid/ill-logical questions about how would you cope with sudden breakdown in system; or where do you see yourself after 5-10 years from now.  Or how do you perceive what are your strengths and weeknesses. One of the most sought out topic was how do you feel about shifting your carrear from academics to  corporate world. Man in normal context if someone would have asked me these qestions, I would have really gave piece of my irritated mind to him/her.  However, since this was an interview, and I right now need job, I tried to be anti-me and it seems people like anti-me in professional life. But the problem is I feel a bit low after giving a grand performance of anti-me. Get this feeling that I am doing something wrong. Hope this feeling goes away as soon as I am one of them. One of the other annoying fact was I had been intervied now totally by 8 different persons for a total of 10 times. Seems I have applied for the post of US president. The only good thing about the interview was the hospitality of the company. The total cost of my visit must have been around 1000 euro. Does seem that they value talent (and hereby I declare my-self OFFICALLY talented).  

I have to wait for a week or so before I get result. I am not sure if I will be taking up the job. Have made some calculations, money is good and attractive. However, one of the aspects of real-me seems to be commitment to non-working. And if have to work, work in India. Additionally came to know that the job is not in the main city as I expected and as the advertisement said. But its in one of the smaller town around 20 kms away. After living in the place where I live, the city in belgium and the town where I am suppose to work, did not appeal me much. But lets wait and watch if I am selected and what pay they offer, before thinking about what to do if I am selected.

Makes me feel that as portrayed in most of the sitcoms that I have been watching, I seem to be having fear towards commitment. Although in sitcoms people have fear of commitment towards jobs, I have fear of commitment towards anything-everything. I turned down PhD for it takes commitment of 5 years. Was then desperate to find a job in EU. Now am thinking of not doing so, even before I am selected. Applying some of my knowledge of psychology, this fear seems to be rooted in rejection to my (in the hind-sight very ill timed, ill logical) marriage proposal during my early college days.